cancer – day 228
What an insane day. I spent the entire day (well, the entire day after noon, since I can’t seem to get out of bed until the last possible minute before having to go to radiation, and then I nap when I get back because I’m so tired, but anyway, it was radiation girl’s version of the entire day) packing up my office and disassembling my office furniture because Brian was coming over with his truck to take the last of my stuff (all the big stuff, including my aquarium) home to Volcanoville while Mark is out teaching tonight. Mark only wanted my stuff moved out by the end of the year, but since I’m leaving Thursday right after radiation to fly to my parents’ for Christmas and not coming back until after New Year’s, I needed to get it done now. I’ve been moving stuff home for weeks, a carload at a time every time I went home. Mark probably would have been ok with my stuff being at his house until sometime in January when I had more energy for packing and moving (and hopefully less neuropathy killing my hands), but you know, once someone asks you when you’re going to move your stuff out after your treatment is over, well, it just doesn’t feel too good to stick around or leave anything behind (though he is keeping my fish for me while I’m gone, picking me up from the airport when I get back . . .). So I finished packing everything today, and by the time Brian showed up I was done in, my hands were toast, just little claws that couldn’t grip anything, and I was exhausted. He had to load everything in the truck by himself, and then up at my house he unloaded everything and got the heavy stuff (the office furniture) put away in the garage for me, and moved my bookshelf to the guest room to make room in the living room for the aquarium, which he got into place for me . . . I tell ya, Brian is one of a kind, one of the best friends a person could have. Bummer he’s moving to Denver next month to live with his fiancé, but yay for him that he’s getting married next year. 🙂
My last radiation session is at 7:15AM on Thursday. Then I have an 11:30AM flight to Denver, then on to Sioux Falls. Originally I wasn’t supposed to fly home until the 20th or something, but then, sometime in November, I think, I changed my flight up to the 15th so I could be home longer. And as Mark got more and more burned out in my cancer treatment, I started missing my family more and more, and when this thing came up that Mark had to go to Phoenix the last few days of my radiation, it just didn’t make sense to stay around Sac another weekend when I could already be with my family, where I am so longing to be right now.
So I changed my flight AGAIN, and bumped it up to Thursday, a few hours after my last radiation session. But I didn’t tell my parents, I didn’t tell anyone who was connected to my parents in any way, only my local Sac friends know I’m flying home right after my last radiation.
My parents don’t know. They still think I’m flying home on Monday. So they should be pretty darn surprised when I ring their doorbell Thursday night! I’ve intentionally been a couple days behind in posting my blog, because if I posted about what I’m really doing when I’m doing it, like packing and moving today, that would ruin the surprise!
I am so relieved to be going home soon. Lately, whenever things seem really difficult, I can tell myself it’s ok, I’ll get through it, and a week from now I’ll be home watching a movie with my dad or having a glass of wine with my parents or whatever, and somehow that’s made the last week or two sufferable. I am soooo ready for this to be over . . .