Author: Cynthia Swan

Hmmmm, I only feel relieved and amused, and a tinge of guilt for not being upset. A student sent a complaint to my department chair today saying “I will never again agree to take any class given by Prof. Cynthia Miller. I refuse any classes with her. Total disaster of a class and prof. experience, on a great many levels.” […]

I’ve started trying to go for walks. In all honesty, the first “walk” was just to the end of my driveway and around the house. My driveway is a little bit of a winding road, though still no great distance. Not even far enough for a whole chapter of Jane Austen on CD, but I had my earphones on thinking […]

I didn’t end up going to Sacramento. I got all ready, did all the makeup and stuff, and was about to put my dress on, but couldn’t talk myself into it. I just didn’t want to leave home. I haven’t had a quiet non-work weekend at home in so long, and I have to go to Sac the next two […]

I am completely enamored of Jane Austen’s writing. After I discovered the tiny Georgetown library with seven shelves of books on CD, I started listening to classics while driving. On the way to Reno last weekend I finished Oliver Twist (not by Austen), and on the way back I started Sense and Sensibility, which was her first novel. And, though […]

Well, there you go, the “cancer” phone call happened one year ago. 365 days. Not quite sure how to feel about that. Seems like forever ago, seems like yesterday, can’t believe it’s been a year already, thought it would never end while I was going through it. I just got off the phone with Susan LeDeaux, whom I am doing […]

So the reason the 4 hours in the car to drive to an 8-minute oncologist appointment was worth it yesterday has nothing to do worth my treatment, but it’s one of those things that give the word serendipity meaning. The annual Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure is coming up in two weeks in Sacramento. Last year I heard […]

Chuckle. One of my friends sent me an e-mail about scheduling something, and included a quick “P.S. Your blog is very pink.” =D Another oncologist appointment today. Four hours in the car, holding on to that damn steering wheel through all my twisty roads (but mostly controlling it with the heel of my hand on the freeway). Nothing exciting to […]

Oy vey, the slow confused brain makes my work require so much more focus! And I’m still not as efficient as I used to be, I think. And wow, am I wiped out come six or seven o’clock. I went to a swing event last weekend, but I actually left a night earlier than I had planned, because my feet […]

Oh dear lord, how do people get through this? Like, I am going to have to go back to my journal from chemo 2 and 3 and 4 to remember how the hell people get through this. So much pain, I can’t describe it. There’s no way in hell I’m going to be able to walk tomorrow, let stand up […]

I woke up this morning to the sound of something clattering from my beside dresser to the floor under my bed, and cat bells jingling. Mizzou had decided it was time for me to get up, and decided to wake me by flicking my glasses onto the floor with as much clamor as possible. I had slept in, it being […]

Still pondering where my writing ended up yesterday, though I don’t have much typing left in my fingers today . . . I remember when I had the “interview” with Gary about going to Chain part-time and keeping my independent Cielem’el consulting going as well (instead of taking a super-stressful ridiculously high-paying VP job at Manugistics). Gary and I have […]

When I’m working this much and not doing anything else but getting some crummy sleep, journaling just seems to be beyond me. My hands are in pain all day typing for work, using the mouse, holding the phone, and the neuropathy gets worse through the day the more consistently I have to use my hands. One nice thing, it’s been […]

Uff da. I have been working or sleeping every minute since I got home Sunday evening. I’ve been working so hard that I haven’t even done a cut/paste from my journal to the blog yet, I think I’m three or four postings behind. Only two more weeks before the Summit now . . . But I can’t really work at […]

Arrgh, soooo tired. 11PM and just finishing up work. But I had three big item deadlines today, and I got everything done. Three days’ worth of work in one day. Whew! All I wanted to write now was a quick blog note for my WoW friends to brag that Kyle is a longtime WoW, like, GOD, and he has this […]

Today I met Lyle for brunch before starting my drive back. It was really neat to hear more about his kids and their personalities and interests. He and Jess have really done the parenting thing right, if the personalities of their kids are anything to show for it. I was so tired coming back that I had to pull off […]