I confused reality again this morning. My alarm had gone off (4:20AM) and I haven’t adjusted well to the time zone difference . . . 4:20AM here still feels like the 2:20AM it is at home in California. You know, I love my parents and I love spending time with them, but the more time I spend in southeastern South Dakota, the more I wish they could come out to California more instead. But Mom has a huge network of friends here, and I think they’re so busy they can’t even be snowbirds, going down to Phoenix or San Diego for the worst couple months of winter at least, like a lot of other retired folks here do.

So I’ve been really tired and dragging while trying to work. And the neuropathy is suddenly back to awful, probably because of the cold. My neurologist said the cold here (which is generally always below freezing and often below zero) would exacerbate the neuropathy in both my feet and my hands, and she’s right. Oh how I wish I could take more time off from Chain to not use my hands. Ooooooh, here’s a thought. Maybe I go back to being half-time with Chain. Run only Truckload and my Summit Conference, still have health insurance, and get them to change my bonus structure so that I get a lot more of my salary AS salary instead of in this stupid bonus program that has zero impact n the quality or quantity of my work. And then I’d have even more time to work on Cielem’el and organizing my 2011 travel plans and setting up speaking engagements and workshops.

OK, now, all that aside . . . this morning. I reset my alarm for 5:20AM and tried to snooze a little longer. I had dozed off but was turning over and Mizzou resettled in the crook of my arm and Seoul was against my leg. Then, clear as a bell, I hear footsteps come across the living room and through my doorway to come about four steps into my room, then stand there quietly, making sure I was all right. My Mom does that sometimes if I’m sick and really sleep in, she gets worried and comes down to check on me, but that’s late morning. And I asked her later today if she came to my room at 5:10AM and she said no, she didn’t get up until six o’clock today.

It was soooo completely real. I couldn’t see who it was because it’s so darn dark all the time now, and itwas even darker behind the figure than it is across the room at my bed. I held my head up, holding both the cats, and just stared into that space where the footsteps had stopped and there could have been a shadow, or I could have imagined it. Or there could have been someone there in one reality and also in a parallel reality (superposition, gotta love quantum physics) but then when I observed the figure only one could exist and so the one in my reality be it dream or awake, disappeared.

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The Next Morning – More “Dream” Figures?

This morning there was even more activity, I heard two sets of footsteps, and I swear I thought my mom came in the room and went across to the window to show my dad something there. I sat up and they hurried out of the room.

“mom?” pause.  “Mom?” pause. “MOM?!?” No answer. I laid  back down and tried to figure out if I was awake or asleep and decided it must be a dream.

Or is there something wrong with my window?