cancer – day 845

I didn’t know until Friday afternoon that this is Memorial Day weekend and we have Monday off. Yesterday I did a month’s worth of laundry, and today I’ve been messing around setting up my laptop. I’ve also been reading more of Steve Pavlina’s blog and about his experiment of inspiration, and now it’s evolving into subjective reality. I just read something that I don’t want to forget:

“We’re all cells in the larger body of humanity. We have both an individual identity and a collective one. The health of the body and the health of the cells are one.”

That’s a pretty darn good analogy.

Here’s another one I like:

“The more asleep you are — i.e. the more you succumb to the false belief that you’re in an objective world — the more you must live out your days as an NPC, unable to reprogram the dream.”

NPC = Non Player Character 

I read all the way through Steve Pavlina’s blog on the acting on inspiration experiment. It was interesting. I’m not sure where I thought it would go, but the outcome was not what I expected. How’s that for a weird statement?

Then I drew today’s Rune – Laguz – Flow, Water, That Which Conducts. Practically every sentence of it resonated with me today . . .

Unseen powers are active here, powers that nourish, shape, and connect. The attributes of this Rune are water, fluidity, the ebb and flow of emotions, careers, and relationships. Laguz encourages you to immerse yourself in the experience of living without having to evaluate or understand. It speaks to the satisfaction of emotional needs, to the awakening of the intuitive or lunar side of your nature. This Rune often signals a time for cleansing, for revaluing, reorganizing realigning. A Rune of deep knowing, it may call you to study spiritual matters in readiness for self-transformation. Success now lies in contacting your intuitive wisdom and attuning to your own rhythms. Laguz is a Rune of the self relating rightly to the Self.

I don’t know what I should do though. How do you get to the place of transformation? I feel like I’ve made some progress in how I interact with other people. I seem to generally give off a good vibe now that envelopes other people when they interact with me. Not everyone, of course, and I’m not sure if it works when I’m talking to clients over the phone, but service people being the kind I see most (gas station attendants, store cashier, occasionally campers or people stopping at rest areas). I never go to San Francisco or Sacramento to see the people who used to be my friends. The vast majority of my very close friends are actually all over the country anyway. Colorado, L.A., Utah, Arizona, Georgia, Minnesota, Florida . . . pretty much everywhere except where I actually live. And even these people that I feel are my close friends, I don’t do a lot to stay in touch with them. Johnny V. I have to call, and there are a few I text with, but otherwise it’s mostly on facebook, and I’m not even good with keeping up with that, though I am better about that than e-mail, which I forget about for weeks at a time.