cancer – day 308

It’s too bad my home is two hours away from Sacramento and all my oncology doctors and treatment, and that I got so carsick during treatment that I couldn’t come home. I think I would have been a lot stronger emotionally and less stressed during treatment if I could have been home in the forest instead of trapped in Sacramento, imprisoned by treatment and the debilitation of my body’s struggle.

There is something so reassuring to me about being in a place where you never have to lock your vehicle and everyone you see waves and is friendly. That’s what Volcanoville and Georgetown are like.

I’m at the eye doctor’s again, hoping (but not expecting) my eyes to have finally settled into a consistent, correctable state. My eyesight has been a problem since chemo, when I was occasionally so blind I could not see words @ 200% on my 21-inch monitor or see my own handwriting while I wrote (which I discovered makes it incredibly difficult to write). So, it stinks that my eyes are still messed up and seem to change from bad to good to worse to better with seemingly random occurrance, but at least I can always get through a work day well enough, sometimes with some strain but never feeling so blind as during treatment.

Anyway, even being worried and in pain (the constant neuropathy burning, ugh) and sadly tired, I still feel good as a being, getting in my “electric lime” Jeep Rubicon and wheeling down the hill from Volcanoville to Georgetown. It’s so beautifully green and full of life, this peaceful place where I make my home. And when you come upon tiny little three-block Georgetown and every person you make eye contact with smiles, you can’t possibly do anything but smile back, whole-heartedly.